Back
in the day when they danced to the Kinks
And every tv drama featured kitchen sinks
The Flowers' they were bloomin' and their love
was true
And the world had never even heard of B and
Q
But
it wasn't too long before the rot set in
And although it wasn't what you'd call a cardinal
sin
She didn't mind the beer and she could tolerate
the fags
But she couldn't stand his stash of DIY mags
Hand
tools, Cuprinol
Wood glue, spag bol
Ginger nuts, bib and brace
Half price fireplace
Rusty hinge, multi-tool
Turks head, steel rule
Swarfiga, wood screw
Wing nut, love me do
He does exactly as it says on the tin
Even
his best kecks are peppered with artex
But Neville Flowers is a very nice man
God he's fantastic with sealant and mastik
Neville Flowers is a very nice man
B and Q, Home Base nonpartisan
Chandeliers in his caravan, man
Neville Flowers is a very nice man
She
eat a Toblerone down the telephone
When she finally told him she was leaving home
It floored him like the decking on his new veranda
So he tried to smooth it over with a Black and
Decker sander
But
she was having none of it and told him the score
He tried to entice her with a woodblock floor
Some Rapid Hardware vouchers, beads and bangles
But where she walked with angels, he worked
with angles
Hand
tools, Cuprinol
Wood glue, spag bol
Ginger nuts, bib and brace
Half price fireplace
Rusty hinge, multi-tool
Turks head, steel rule
Swarfiga, wood screw
Wing nut, love me do
He does exactly as it says on the tin
Even
his best kecks are peppered with artex
But Neville Flowers is a very nice man
God he's fantastic with sealant and mastik
Neville Flowers is a very nice man
B and Q, Home Base nonpartisan
Chandeliers in his caravan, man
Neville Flowers is a very nice man
He
misses her touch when he unblocks a drain
(She was decorated for bravery in the bathroom
campaign)
The celtic tattoo on the left bingo wing
And the way she blew smoke through her sovereign
ring
Now
he whiles away the hours in the downstairs bog
Fingering the pages of the Argos catalogue
And fondly remembers the power drill he lent
her
When he dines alone at the garden centre
Hand
tools, Cuprinol
Wood glue, spag bol
Ginger nuts, bib and brace
Half price fireplace
Rusty hinge, multi-tool
Turks head, steel rule
Swarfiga, wood screw
Wing nut, love me do
He does exactly as it says on the tin
Even
his best kecks are peppered with artex
But Neville Flowers is a very nice man
God he's fantastic with sealant and mastik
Neville Flowers is a very nice man
B and Q, Home Base nonpartisan
Chandeliers in his caravan, man
Neville Flowers is a very nice man
